Permission 2 Speak Freely Podcast

Day of Reflection, Mental Health Barriers, Resilience x Brilliance

• Thee Highest Chief Ali & Lay Loe Tha Mos • Episode 34

Share episode

Let us know how we're doing Freedom Speakers! Send us a text

What if taking charge of your mental health could transform how you experience the holidays and beyond? Join us, your hosts Chief Ali and Lay Loe Tha Mos, as we share our personal mental health ratings and reflect on how family connections can both challenge and empower us during the festive season. We open up about the lessons learned in 2024, focusing on personal growth, accountability, and the often tricky balance between being independent and knowing when to rely on others for support. Our discussion is especially geared towards supporting powerful Black men, acknowledging the societal hurdles they face in navigating mental health.

As we journey through the trials and triumphs of the past year, we explore the profound idea that happiness is a personal responsibility that cannot be outsourced, not even in the closest of relationships. Emphasizing resilience and perseverance, we discuss the urgency of achieving personal goals in a world still adjusting to life after COVID. With insights drawn from family wisdom and cultural influences, we aim to inspire our listeners to keep moving forward, irrespective of life's relentless pressures and the perception of being alone in their struggles.

Triumphing over adversity takes center stage as we delve into the emotional landscapes of visualization, self-belief, and resilience. We celebrate the successes and challenges in both our personal and professional lives, sharing stories that resonate with the unique strength and soul of Black individuals. Inspired by cultural icons like J Cole and the spirit of martial arts films, we reflect on the historical and spiritual narratives of Black resilience, promising richer discussions in the future. We express our heartfelt gratitude to our listeners for their unwavering support, as we look forward to bringing you more engaging and insightful content.

P2SF Podcast Official Intro By Lay Loe Tha Mos Produced By Chief Ali

https://podcasts.apple.com/podcast/id1696215502
www.bnbossn.com
@permission2_speakfreelypodcast
@layloe.thamos,
@mochachoco_latte
@kweenland
All merch made by @nessas_crafty_nest,
All music, production, and vocals edited by Chief Ali,
Keep Powering Forward #chiefali 🧘🏽‍♂️🥋🕴🏽🪶

Speaker 1:

I'm gonna get artisan with it, cause we gon' be alright For sure. Man. Lay low the most. What's happening with you, bro? Tell me today how you feeling man. How are you feeling mentally? Let's start there. How are you feeling mentally, mentally, man?

Speaker 2:

I'm doing pretty good.

Speaker 1:

I must say, man, I'm doing pretty good the holiday season used to. I'm a pretty good. I must say, man, I'm doing pretty good the holiday season used to.

Speaker 2:

I'm a Grinch. I'm really a Grinch man, but the holiday season used to get me down, but I'm feeling pretty. I'm actually excited this year.

Speaker 1:

Actually excited man, be around my folks. You know we had a family loss recently so we got a little taste of being together, you know, and I like that shit. But how you doing, man, how you feeling With my hands, feeling with my hands, how you doing, nah, man, I'm doing all right, man? Thank you for asking. I'm going to definitely say that, man. I'm feeling all right man. I'm doing all right at 6.7. Feeling neutral. My personal neutral is like 7.5. Okay, but I'm feeling pretty neutral. What's standard for you? 8.5. Okay, 8.5.

Speaker 2:

Up to 10. Yeah for sure, up to 10. Up to 10.

Speaker 1:

I don't know too many folks who 10s every day. It's like, hey, you're going to have to crash sometime. You know who only tens every day? Who that Junkies, niggas that stay high, stay high on the bulls. They don't got a care in the world. They do have one care. They got a lot of cares, but they don't care. They don't care about them.

Speaker 1:

They got one care, we're going gonna get that next yeah, man, but uh, how about you, man, if you can put it into a number, into a scale? What was yours again? Uh, about 6.7, 6.7. I'll say a solid 6.2. Okay, you know what I'm saying? I don't think I'm at where you are.

Speaker 2:

You, you know what I mean, but Slopper's still pretty good. You know what I'm saying.

Speaker 1:

Six that's average. It ain't bad. You know what I?

Speaker 2:

mean.

Speaker 1:

Above neutral. I call it. Yeah, are you above? Yeah, for sure, we you know. Yeah, it's Freedom Speakers. Thank you all for tuning in to another episode of Permission to freely podcast. So much. I am your host, the highest chief, ali, and I'm here, man, with my bro, host with the most man. I love this man. Tell these people who you are now.

Speaker 2:

They know me. They know me, man.

Speaker 1:

They love the most man, how y'all doing out there I mean we, we appreciate y'all tuning in man and actually picking up on what I would consider part two of our supporting powerful black men. We like to start off asking each other how's our mental and engaging where we are. Man, as my man said, can't be a 10 every day. Dimes don't really exist like they used to. That's a bar. I like that, cool. But we fighting a good fight. And 2024, they used to, that's a bar. That's a bar. I like that, yeah, cool.

Speaker 1:

But you know we fighting a good fight and you know 2024 has shown us a lot of things. Man, we are in that fourth quarter and one of the things that I can say and we can go back and forth with this man, I feel like that'll be a good thing. And we just keep going back and forth about one thing that 2024 has taught us and shown us. So I'll go first on this one man. 2024 has shown me that I gotta get my reps up. Okay, I'm, I'm strong and I'm powerful in a lot of ways, but I'm not the only one telling me hey, you're doing good, but you ain't doing well. Keep getting your reps up, nigga. You still got more to go. You still got so much more to tank and that it puts me in a good place. Man, tell me something that 2024 has taught you. 2024?.

Speaker 2:

Well, 2024 has taught me um, it's on you. 2024 taught me um, it's on you. 2024 taught me it's on you. It's like a motto, you know what I mean. Like ain't nobody going to do it for you. You got to do it, you know. It's on you. Like, when they pass the ball, it's on you. Last shot of the game. It's on you. You know. I could go into details on that at a later date. You, a nigga, pass the ball. It's on you, nigga. Last shot of the game. It's on you, you know.

Speaker 1:

I could go into details on that at a later date.

Speaker 2:

But but I I guess I kind of want to leave it vague like that for now.

Speaker 1:

Man 2024 has showed me alright, nigga, it's on you what you gonna do. It's on you what you gonna do, cause we men you know what I mean, it ain't sure, you know. We, we all man, we got people we can lean on, you know, but you can only do so much leaning. You can only do so much leaning, especially as a man. You know absolutely man, absolutely, and you, some, some, some circles, they'll look at it as if you need him, but so much help as a man that that's a weakness and it really isn't man. We, you know, we need all the help and assistance we can get man. So I'll tell you this 2024 has taught me that people will be mad, that you're happy and that's sad like hey oh that's a fact, like hey I'm, I'm really working on being happy.

Speaker 1:

you know how that, don't you? How kids with no worries wake up just happy Grownups that went to bed, broke, woke up in the worst condition. You know what I'm? Saying they got to get their shit together. They ain't get a good night's sleep because it was some shit they still needed to do. But just giving that up like, hey, man, it's a process to make yourself happy, nobody else can make you happy. That is absolutely on. You make yourself happy, nobody else can make you happy.

Speaker 2:

That is absolutely on you. It's nobody else's job to make you happy, no matter if you in a you dating, or you in a relationship, you in a marriage. It ain't nobody's job to make you happy, ain't?

Speaker 1:

nobody out here, yo yo clown yo entertainment.

Speaker 2:

You know, I remember man my, uh, I can't one thing. I can't stand when the kids more so, the boys being a day a little older- it'll be a chill Saturday, or a chill Sunday, something like that, and they had been outside and they ain't allowed to play the game because they had been fucking up and shit like that.

Speaker 2:

And they come. Dad, I'm bored. One day I'll tell Lays what the fuck you want me to light bowling pins on fire and start juggling them and some shit. What the fuck you want me to do. You know what I'm saying. I'm not your entertainment. There's plenty of shit in here to do. You just can't do what you feel like is the only thing in the world.

Speaker 2:

I can't play any games so there's nothing left, go shoot basketball out in the driveway go ride your bike, go rake these leaves, go rake, go play in them, go rake them up, put them in a big ass pile and jump in them and throw them all back over the yard again. You know you will have a ball you will, you will that's definitely a blast but um, but nah, that's, uh, that's, that's, that's where I'm at with it, and it's nobody's job to make you happy.

Speaker 1:

That's important for everybody to know it's on you, it's on you, yeah, and that's that's. That's that's when, uh, you know that's a solo road at your own pace, in your own time. Man, go ahead and get the people and give people, uh, something else. That 2024 has taught you Something else. For 2024? Nobody care, that's a good one. I wouldn't even say just 2024, game of that when I say nobody cares.

Speaker 2:

That's more of an internal thing that you got to remember. Of course, you have people who care about you, but you got to have a mind state as if nobody gives a shit and keep pushing through what you got to push through.

Speaker 2:

You know what I mean. Like you got to have that up here you can talk to your folks and you can make feel so much better after I just talked and got that off. No, you need to act like nobody else gives a shit. Nobody else, it's you. It's you what Cat Williams say. You, the all-star player.

Speaker 2:

You know what I'm saying your shit, yeah, yeah, but that would be another one. Those two, because I kind of function in mottos a lot of times. You know, like people who be on the phone with me they hear me say one day at a time, or like now, when I answer the phone to somebody and say, hey, I just want to let you know something. I'll say like what's the word?

Speaker 1:

Okay, okay, what's?

Speaker 2:

the word, or Complaining about something. Hey, we just ate one day at a time. You know what I'm saying. Tomorrow going to bring something else, what you going to do? Cry.

Speaker 1:

You going to hide from the day? You can't hide from the day. You cannot hide from the day. That's a bar right there.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, you don't try to hide from daylight. Nah, this sun is touching me. Yeah, like no, you got to get out and gonna bring.

Speaker 1:

You gotta get into it. You gotta keep pushing through this shit. You know grandma used to say time, don't wait on nobody. Now what she meant by that, when she would say that would be. You know, she'll see the kids for the first time in a few weeks and how old are you?

Speaker 2:

I'm eight. Girl time don't wait on nobody so she meant like time move fast. However, I take that from grandma and say hey man you can stay stagnant if you want to, but life gonna keep on pushing. You'll get left behind. Time ain't waiting on you. Time ain't waiting on you to get your shit together.

Speaker 1:

Hey, say that again one more time. Time is not waiting on you to get your shit together.

Speaker 2:

You still got a birthday coming up. You still going to be 43 this year. You can't change that.

Speaker 1:

Nigga written due on the first.

Speaker 2:

It ain't going to wait on you. Oh, let's, okay, let's stop time real quick.

Speaker 1:

Let's chill, chill, he ain't got it.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, let's wait. Let's wait till he catch up a little bit.

Speaker 1:

Let's pause for three years, hey, man, that leads me into this man. 2024 has taught me that the world has found some level of normalcy and you gotta keep the fuck up. You got to get back on track and push yourself to wherever it is that you see you want to be. You can't use COVID, no more. There's no excuse for shit. They just kind of look at you funny now, like we don't even quarantine for that shit, no more, or nothing. What you mean. So the world finding some level of normalcy is like, hey, you need to get back on track, you need to get your shit back moving.

Speaker 1:

And when we do as men, uh, we deal in production. Okay, we're viewed as how much can we produce? How much can we provide? How much can we offer? Is that a negative thing? No, but for some it can be, can be difficult. You feel me? Uh, for most is difficult. I ain't gonna say nobody got this shit figured out.

Speaker 1:

You can have finance and have no sense of money, if that makes sense. Not having and having more money but no financial literacy just gave you more to fuck off, all right. Or you can look at people who look like they have it all where they have the world and lost a soul Empty. Ain't got it? Yeah, and permission to speak freely.

Speaker 1:

You already know I found myself in that place of life, not that I've lost my soul. I have to find my, find myself having to protect it. I've gained the world, but that doesn't mean much to me. I have materials I have like. But remember, that's a level of responsibility, that's a level of success. I can't deny my success, like I can't, because it makes people feel some kind of way that hey, materials make you view me as successful. Okay, all right, I manage these things, but I have to guard myself and guard my soul, because I don't know who really wants something from me. So sometimes it can make me cold, it can make me short, it can make me having, like reading certain things a little different of man, this person just nice to me because they want something from me.

Speaker 1:

They don't really care fully about my well-being. I'm just the easiest route to get them from a fucked up situation. Uh-huh, and it's not flattering. It really does something to my esteem. Like, hey, I really like to not even be known or looked at as the guy even though, like I said, in some circles that just comes but primarily man, I like to just kind of be just in the cut man. So I find me in that place like hey man, people will train me and pull from me because they need something from me. Yeah, and feel like, hey, I can offer it.

Speaker 1:

And it makes me sad. It makes me sad, it makes me have. It doesn't help. My trust issues For sure. So how do you navigate that? The easiest way is alienate myself. Right, just, I have the ability to keep myself away. But in contact with people I try to keep things as short as I can and I give myself time to think and not be impulsive, because I'll get to hear Mr Ken, ken, my cat crying and then my dog started dying and then you wouldn't believe the fish was frying and I don't know what to do.

Speaker 2:

Mr ken, is there anything that you can do?

Speaker 1:

and I'm sitting there like damn man was. Was the fish deep fried friend? Yeah, I can't solve the problem where they looking to hey ethically, if I throw some money at it they'll feel better, but they don't feel better. They don't even make me feel better. But just bringing it full circle Freedom Speakers, I have those challenges at times. Just on, hey man, you really like, so you don't really care about me. You really want more materials of what I can offer, and it makes me sad. Protect your spirit by all costs, at all costs, man. So how do you find yourself protecting yourself from, like, people who can leech or can drain you? Um, I gotta be honest, jim, I won't say I had an issue leeching. No damn, it's me. Huh, but I, but not as far as draining, though. As far as draining, though.

Speaker 2:

Um, I go iso as well. It happened a few weeks ago, two weeks ago, man, where I just, I just wasn't answering the phone. I just wasn't answering the phone and I had to ask my wife to like. Hey, like, protect me.

Speaker 1:

You know what I'm saying and that may sound weird to some people.

Speaker 2:

He asked his wife to protect him, what I know she's supposed to do a certain aspect.

Speaker 1:

You know what I'm saying. Protect me in this particular situation.

Speaker 2:

In some situations, protect me from me.

Speaker 1:

You know Bigger facts.

Speaker 2:

But in this particular situation it's like you know, protect me. You know what I'm saying. Whether it was family members trying to call me, hey, reach out to them. Just let them know I'm fine, he just needs some space.

Speaker 1:

Leave him the fuck alone. Leave my man the fuck alone for a minute. He good, I got him and that's necessary.

Speaker 1:

Oh for sure, for sure, you are a prized man and a family of beautiful women who seek to see men and that are at your stature, that are available to them. Yeah, it ain't really many out there. They don't show up to the meetings with us when we in there. No, we don't show up.

Speaker 1:

I ain't seen so being that same man in my family, vanessa's dealt sometimes with that issue and it'd be like, hey, man, I need you to protect me real quick. Very much the same way and she'll be like you know the family might. Hey, can I come over, can I hang out? Or I've been reaching out to Ken. Is he cool? And she just, you know he's been working, doing stuff, he's figuring things out. You know it's a lot going on right now. Yeah, so it is necessary and it doesn't go without notice. So shout-out to the wives that go ahead and put that roadblock up for protection. Like, hey, he taking the time out. Yeah, he taking the time out. Remember, he get to take as many breaks as he want to, because he don't take no days off For sure. Yeah, he taking his time out.

Speaker 2:

He, remember, he get to take as many breaks as he wants to, because he don't take no days off.

Speaker 1:

So yeah, we need y'all and we, we appreciate that man. Thank y'all, thank y'all, thank y'all, man. So what else is 2024? Has shown you or taught you.

Speaker 2:

You be making me pull from a lot, bro, yeah hey, make me pull from reflection, reflect.

Speaker 1:

it's a day of reflection, reflection is definitely important, man.

Speaker 2:

Another thing 2024. I had to really sit and take some time and go through this year, man, Because quite a few things transpired for sure. Quite a few things, man, and sometimes it take those social media memories to come back and show you like, oh, yeah, yeah, I remember what happened that day when I, when I posted this shit you know I'm saying a long ass paragraph I said you know what I mean, but uh, but it, like you know, not to, it, just ain't coming to me now. But but you know, 2024, it was a lot and it ain't over, yeah, you know, and it ain't over, man, you got anything else for?

Speaker 1:

2024? Man, like I said, today is a day of reflection for me, man. I mean, I've been pulling from the archives beginning of this year to this very moment of reflection, of reflection. So, freedom of speakers. Even before, as you heard earlier in the show, we were kind of given our gauges of me being about a 6.5. I wasn't always like that. Today, or even earlier, it was more like a 2.7. I was having a low day. But what helps bring me from that space is reflection, pulling from the archives of how much I'm thankful for, I'm proud to be alive, I'm proud to be here doing the things that I'm doing. So, uh, no, this morning or last night, I'll say most definitely we uh stepped fully into the journey of becoming full-time investors in real estate, so we were able to pick up the keys for where the our investment property that was a surreal moment felt real good congratulations on that man thank you, thank you, thank you, man.

Speaker 1:

It was a surreal moment, um, but it was the the shock of it, like hey, man, ain't no turning back now you gotta really go with it in there.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, so you know that it started that last night me being thankful for things and thankful for my wife being there with me doing it, thankful to Alexis and Rachel for being the agents on the job helping us more properties to go. Shout out to them, shout out to Keller Williams. They were able to assist us. Very, very thankful for that. But that started the trickling effect of me being so emotional, and I knew I was. I knew I was going to be emotional like I'm so pumped and I'm so happy.

Speaker 2:

It's just, I saw this in my head. Nobody fucking believed me. Now it's here. Look bitch, Look bitch, Look what fucking happened, bitch.

Speaker 1:

But it's one of them like, keep going, man, it's more than a tank. It's more than a tank. So I had that reflection of passing audits for the year, getting things done for the job, giving raises to the team um, you know, doing better on our infrastructure at a company, better recruiting uh, just all of the different things that made me be like, hey man, you got a lot to live for, you got a lot to be thankful for, you got a lot to be happy about. Can you get your ass whooped in this thing?

Speaker 2:

called life. Oh yeah, for sure, you fight titans bro, I ain't this ain't no entry level.

Speaker 1:

You said, life got hands.

Speaker 2:

Life got the best hands and undefeated.

Speaker 1:

My nigga so is. Hey, I hope, was, I hope to be in the top rankings of I put up a good fight in life. Yeah, yeah, life don't remember me.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, yeah, for sure, write that down, don't remember me. You see that scuff under life I did that.

Speaker 1:

I did that.

Speaker 2:

I'll make titans bleed, I'll back Wayne. Curl up man, hell, no man.

Speaker 1:

I forgot who said it. I want to say it was J Cole. He was like man you only lose if you don't fight back. You only lose when you don't swing. Yeah, for sure, yeah something around them.

Speaker 2:

lines you got it Same shit.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, you got it. But I believe in only good things. Come all shit ain't sweet, okay, I believe shit is not sweet. And when challenges do come, that's really where you get. That's where the you nigga, the crowd gets in. Yeah, crowd gets thin. You get to see, like hey, that nigga, really the nigga man, and it in the face of adversity, in the face of, like this motherfucker, odds is against him. You see a titan emerge from this motherfucker. You never saw, you, you never seen this person be what they are until it was time, as we said earlier, like hey, man the master, normally don't, you don't know he the master, till he start kicking ass once, once. Once you start kicking ass, it's like oh you, and he ain't brawling with everybody is one shot, one shot is one shot. Nostalgic moment for a second people.

Speaker 1:

I remember being a kid and watching the old bruce lee movies, kung fu movies and even, in more recent time, man kill bill, volume one and two, all right, and I'm a huge Kill Bill fan. When Uma Thurman, I forgot what's her name. Copperhead, don't give me that line. Beatrix Kiddo, beatrix Kiddo, that's the name. I know everybody in now.

Speaker 2:

You said Kill Bill, right, kill Bill.

Speaker 1:

When she went to go see the master, the old master, she was a black mamba.

Speaker 2:

That was her aka.

Speaker 1:

She was black mamba because Vivica Fox was mad.

Speaker 1:

I should have been black mamba I should have been a goddamn black mamba I sidebar real quick, man. Her and Vivica was fucking each other up in that. That was probably one of the best fight scenes, for sure, man. But point being, when she went to go train with the master and he was like tough on her and just kind of on her like hey, man, it's so much in you that you don't probably even see, and that master kicking ass effortlessly With no hands, no hands, hey, bitch you, amateur at best, yeah. No hands, no hands. I mean, hey, bitch you, amateur at best, yeah. But somebody pushing you the same as racehorses, man, I'm starting to get into what they call like you're doing well in life events, but going to see you doing dog racing, not the dog racing, but just going first going to Thompson's and betting on the track.

Speaker 1:

That's first one of thompson's and betting on the track, but then the dog. I'm not the dog, the uh horse track go on the horse track and be like hey, man, I won't.

Speaker 1:

I want 300 on thunderbolt, get the. But seeing that, those was the equestrians who train the horses, they only tell you that the best horses have to be broken because they wild. They so used to being free. Oh, yeah, they're. Yeah, they're wild. You know what I'm saying. They're so used to being free. But keep in mind, man, I'm going to take y'all back. Freedom speakers, we're going to go into slavery for a second.

Speaker 1:

Rumor has it, theories have it that that two-thirds of the population that was thrown from heaven, that's supposed to be black people? That's why we down on earth and why our life is so hard. Uh, that's in theories, depending on what you believe and different stuff and stuff like I never heard that one. But the struggles that we, that we are placed with on earth, and people can't see why we still fucking triumph, okay, why we still come make something out of nothing and why we are doomed. If they believe or feel like, hey, we're doomed in this realm, but spiritually, nobody fucks with us, nobody can conjure up as much energy and things as we do. Still under, still under study of, like, how black people are, what do we connect to? Where do you get this soul. From where do you get this power from? Shout out to my white neighbor, troy.

Speaker 1:

Mr troy, fuck church, aka fuck church, that's his name. Um, but he will explain later. It was fun but uh, during covid, you know, that kind of washed a lot of the barriers of different things with people he had asked indirectly because he was trying not to like offend and I respect that. But he's like mr ken, like I see what's going on in the world and our kids and like I know your history, like I I know, but like how do you like you guys are so tough and you smile and you just like how do you like I'm fucking going nuts man, like how, but how do you do it?

Speaker 1:

now from the clear now it's like, hey, man, you, if you've never been without you, you know I'm saying like we see the whole spectrum we've been without and we appreciate the little bit that we do have. And then sometimes we do work enough to have more than what we need, and then we gotta learn how to scale back, because we didn't got fat on having shit we ain't never had before, for sure. So we find that balance, man. But on today's episode we just wanted to give you a sneak peek into our mentos and give you some reflection on 2024.

Speaker 2:

Once again, thank y'all so much for listening. We're going to get it to us more. It's just a little snippet episode for y'all. We're definitely going to give y'all more. We're going to keep the episodes coming.

Speaker 1:

Thank y'all so much for listening and supporting uh for chief ali, I'm layla the most, and this is permission to speak really.

People on this episode

Head Shot

Thee Highest Chief Ali

Host
Head Shot

Lay Loe Tha Mos

Co-host